Tuesday, March 25, 2003

Sphere: Related Content

The NY Press lists the 50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers. My favorites happen to be three of the last four.

4 Ann Coulter, Pundit

Yes, she does live here. What a depressing age we live in, when a horse-faced Tri-Delt who spends her days hurling genocidal threats at foreigners and liberals—whose best come-hither look promises jackboots, pepper gas and the switch—can somehow be considered a sex symbol. What’s next? Vlad the Impaler Beanie Babies? A children’s show called Joseph McCarthy’s Neighborhood? Please, before it’s too late, bring back Charlene Tilton, and send this pampered, vicious bitch back to the stenographic pool where she belongs.


I agree that Ann is irritating. She appeals to loser far right wingers beacause she agrees with them and has a boob job and blonde hair.

3 Michael Moore, Filmmaker/Activist

Slagging on this pandering blowhard is nothing new—especially not in these pages—but he makes it so easy. In the despicable Bowling for Columbine, the lumbering behemoth makes fun of working-class whites in order to make over-educated whites feel better about themselves. His arguments against gun control are simplistic, weak and mired in the cloying stink of self-service, which smells suspiciously like a fat man’s crack. Every time Moore comes out in support of a liberal band or politician or fellow celebrity—as he proved last Sunday night—the hardworking, intelligent and reasoned left is degraded by association. It’s time for activists to jettison the ballast that is Michael Moore and start repairing the damage.


What else can you say.

2 Ted Rall, Freedom Fighter/Cartoonist

Maybe Ted first captured your heart with his blocky cartoon scamps that appear in every lazy, predictable alt-weekly in the country. Maybe you were inspired by his impassioned and daring campaigns against such scourges as internet spam and student loans. (What’s next, Ted? Barking dogs? Rainy days?) Maybe you’ve already slept with him, since to hear him tell it, Ted’s c--k is a diamond-hard, unrelenting p---y magnet. Or, quite possibly you’re one of us—those who’ve suffered through enough of Ted Rall’s comics and editorials and television and radio appearances to know that he’s just another self-righteous shitheel who coasts on self-created controversy and tells himself that any publicity is good publicity. Much like Loathsome New Yorker #3, Michael Moore, Ted Rall’s attempts at political commentary and liberal activism do more harm to the cause than any amount of conservative clampdown. For someone who describes himself as a "First Amendment purist," he sure does spend a lot of time telling other people what to say, and we’ve had enough.


There you have it. Maybe my man Tim Blair would like to comment




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