Sheiks and the Shakes

Tim Blair--soon to be at the center of an international incident--is in the Persian Gulf doing the whole correspondent thing:

“I am Sheik Nasser. These people are my guests.”

And we’d be waved through. I think the Sheik also plays in the 14-team Kuwaiti football competition, thereby multiplying his Sheik powers by a factor of sports-celebritydom. Back at the hotel, I tried a Sheik-style ruse myself:

“Hello, room service? Tim here. I would like a bottle of wine, please.”

“Wine? There is no wine, sir. No wine in the entire country.”

“Did I mention I was Sheik Tim? And that I wanted vodka instead of wine?”

“Goodnight sir.”

It’s one rule here for wealthy Kuwaiti athletes and another rule for degenerate Western infidels, obviously. Heading out now for the Arab Street, where I will talk to two or maybe three people, discard those opinions that don’t agree with mine, and write a powerful column based on any quotes that remain.

It sounds to me like Tim has fallen into the whole foreign correspondent thing quite easily. The only difference is that Tim is actually going out into the street to get quotes as opposed to the mideast staff of the NY Times, which makes them up in their hotel room.